Feeling.. disheartened

I apologize to people reading this blog. I admit it, it has not been the best of my moods lately.

I am frustrated. Frustrated that I am in a period of uncertainty. I don't know when I can find a suitable job. I don't know if i am being unrealistic to say that I want to stay where I am and find work within and hour's drive from my home.

I am hesitant. Hesitant to apply for jobs outside the city area. Because this means I will have to move. And probably only see my friends, Mark and my family on weekends. I see loneliness creeping in on me in that situation. I don't like to admit it, but i know it is the truth.

I feel shit about myself. For not being able to write my resume nicely. Always asking for help from my friends and from Mark. I do feel however, incredibly thankful for all their help. And I do feel a little lucky. (smileeeeeeee)

But overall I feel disheartened. But at the same time, I am still keeping my hopes up. I still believe in that sliver lining and boy am I proud of myself to be able to still feel this way. 2 years ago I would have gone crying home to singapore already.